THE 90 DAY CHALLENGE - CYCLE 5

June 1, 2009

Today begins the third cycle of The 90 Day Challenge, and I am looking forward to creating extraordinary results through this process. In the first 4 cycles, I created great momentum in my life - moved from San Francisco to New York City; landed a wonderful job at a law firm; met James Arthur Ray of “The Secret” and “Harmonic Wealth” fame, and reconnected with old acquaintances from my life during the period that I was an entertainer in New York City.

In Cycles 3 and 4 I created a new environment for myself by moving from Harlem in New York City to Newport, New Jersey; and then met and fell in love with Mitchell Rothlein, who has recently become my fiancé. I am overwhelmed by the amount of love that he has brought to my life.

On a personal level I’ve taken my soul to a deeper level by participating in an experiential education seminar series at Personal Dynamics in New York City. While there, I was asked to staff an Advanced Course, and my great fortune was to be in the presence of a Master Trainer, Kathy Benson, who happens to be an absolutely extraordinary human being. Through her coaching, I have begun to dream big again, and she is the catalyst for my beginning Cycle 5 of this process.

I have also rediscovered, after an absence of more than 25 years, the work of Werner Erhard, and am connected again to an amazing mental and spiritual experience that is inherent in the reality of his “be here now” philosophy.

As before, all areas of my life will be addressed; the spiritual, financial, mental, relational and physical. I am clear that intention and focus in all areas must be present in order to accomplish this chapter of my dreams.

With great projects to accomplish in this cycle, I must clearly focus on every aspect of my life. I continue to grow stronger emotionally and relationally, and am determined to recreate a new physicality through my body that can be seen as outstanding once again. I must pay more attention to the gifts of my physical beauty. I’ve been blessed for a reason. Over the past 9 years, I have gotten complacent with my appearance and it is time to turn up the heat again….I intend to be “hot” again by the end of this cycle. Yes, I just said that! 90 days can truly be the start of an incredible future if I stand firmly in this intention.

The main project in this cycle is to recreate my artistic life by redesigning myself as a singer once again. I’ve been dreaming for many years of returning to the cabaret stage, and time has arrived for me to stand up and be heard once again. I am planning a major new musical presentation, singing all new material in a way that reflects the journey that my life has taken over the past 20 years. With a nod to my past, I will move clearly with what is real and true for me now. I have matured greatly, and my intent is that it be reflected in the music that I create.

Additionally, I intend to marry Mitchell in the next 4 months, so amazing emotional preparation has to occur in order to blend my life with his. It is clear that my residence will change soon, and I have to create a stand that works for both of us to feel supported and loved.

So, here, on day 1, I declare my commitment to create all of these wonderful things by August 31, 2009. It’s going to be an extraordinary summer!

Take Me Higher: I AM THAT, I AM

What Would You Attempt To Do If You Knew You Could Not Fail?

A couple of years ago, I received a paperweight for Christmas with the above statement stamped on the top. Over the years, I have glanced at it, never really giving any real attention, as I have always believed that if any aspect of my life was to be, it would have to be up to me.

Over the course of this past year, I have come to more fully appreciate the wisdom stamped onto that familiar paperweight.

As I have stated in past posts, I relocated back to New York City on January 20, 2008. It has been an amazing year, and I would like to share a bit of my life experience over the course of 2008.

I started the year by saying farewell to friends in San Francisco.

Once in New York City, I moved into an apartment building in Harlem, thinking that it might be interesting to live primarily among Black folks for once in my life. The complex was named after a legendary ballroom, The Savoy, a wonderful and historic venue that was a landmark during the Harlem Renaissance in the 1930's. The original buildings were demolished in the early 1960's, replaced by highrize apartment buildings for middle income residents. Those buildings were purchased several years ago, and have gone through a renovation, listed as "luxury".

The current owners grossly misrepresented the condition of the property and the neighborhood in their documentation, and it was clear from my first week that I had made a major mistake in taking up residence there. My experience was a stark realization: the majority of lifelong residents displayed stereotypical behavior, much of which had disappeared from my life experience in the early 1970's. It seems that life on welfare, teenage pregnancy, guns, drugs and all that goes along with it remains alive and well in certain areas of Harlem, New York. To be fair, some areas are truly beautiful, but not in the part of Harlem that I was experiencing. Most people that currently speak about the "new" Harlem are talking about "west" Harlem (from Broadway to the Hudson River) and areas along 125 street where the Clinton Building is located. The majority of Harlem is still in need of gentrification and a true cultural and financial wakeup call.

Many of Harlem's residents continue to live at or below the poverty level, have and display great anger, and want to blame the world for their circumstances, rather than taking steps to lift themselves up to a higher existence. As it became clear that I was not a lifelong resident of Harlem, nor a member of the "hood", I was targeted as an outsider, someone who did not belong. After being verbally abused by thugs hanging out on street corners, and after a series of drive-by shootings that occurred in my neighborhood last Spring, I decided that enough was enough. I came to the conclusion that Black folks are the same as other groups of people: some good, some bad. This particular group was working my last nerve. So, 6 months after my arrival, I vacated Harlem, and moved to Newport, New Jersey. http://www.newportnj.com/


Newport is only a few miles away from Harlem, but the differences between the two locations could not be more distinct. It is a new, wealthy community incorporated in 1986 and built on the shoreline at Jersey City. It overlooks the former World Trade Center and 9/11's Ground Zero, that is now going through a tough, but stellar, rebuilding process. Newport is a physically lush, beautiful place, with an international mixture of residents, and everyone is very respectful of one another. It has an extremely high level of security and outstanding management. My building is located right at water’s edge, with a spectacular view of New York City, the Hudson Bay, southwestern New Jersey and beyond.


After moving into a penthouse level suite, I hired a painter, and now feel safe and secure in a place that nurtures me every day. Having donated my former furniture to charities in San Francisco before I left, I’ve had the opportunity to design a room more beautiful than I could have imagined, which reflects the journey that my life has taken over the last 10 years. My new home is comprised of pictures, objects of art and furnishings that were hand picked by myself, and each holds a memmory of past days of my life.


Additionally, shortly before my permanent arrival back to NYC, I was offered a position with a Dallas based law firm in their New York City office. I am proud to say that I am working with a large cast of characters that are not unlike those seen on the TV show Boston Legal. We have our very own Denny Crane, Allan Shore, and Shirley Schmidt, just to name a few. It is engaging to watch them every day and marvel at the way their personal attributes facilitate their creation of a successful – and profitable – practice here in NYC.

Over the past few months, I have had the opportunity to reacquaint myself with music and the industry that I’d left behind many years before, and am, once again, working on resuming my interest in the Cabaret circuit in New York City. Additionally, I have created a successful personal coaching business, and am building a client base which will allow for future expansion.

As you can probably summize, not everything about this relocation has been joyful. One of the most disappointing aspects of relocating back to the NYC area has been the realization that old friends and acquaintances still living here have become jaded, and have done little to welcome me back to the city. Rarely a telephone call or invitation to reconnect has been offered, even though I've made every effort to reconnect with them. I've now realized that time has moved on, and have had to make the difficult, yet necessary decision to release those old relationships of the past. I’m now building a new network of friends, and recently have become involved in a relationship that is going very well, with great promise for the future.

So, looking over my year, that old saying on the paperweight comes to mind – "what would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?" – and I have come to this very specific conclusion: I’ve finally grown into a man that is secure in the knowledge that hope, faith, love, wealth and abundance and happiness are all my god-given right. Even those things that appear to be dissapointments can usually be transmuted into wonderful experiences.

I've learned that the disappointments in life need not be a final end result. By pushing the envelope a little farther, amazing gifts are usually right under the surface. Barack Obama, and my life experience, are amazing proof of the divine in our lives.

Lastly, Bravo to America, and the new President-Elect. Last Tuesday, November 4, 2008, is a day that I did not expect to see in my lifetime, yet I continued to hold the possibility in my heart of a Black American President. Hold on to your dreams. They do, indeed, come true!

The mantra that facilitated my beginning this blog project several years ago continues to permeate my everyday life:

I AM THAT, I AM.





Kristian Alexis Perry
November 13, 2008

My World Is Empty Without You

My San Francisco View 2007

Today: April 24, 2008

Everyone,

It has been many months since I have last posted here, and I have an amazing story to tell. At the end of the first cycle of “The 90 Day Challenge”, I took an assessment of my life and the application of the tools that I spoke about last July, and how they affected my living in the world. I was blown away be the ease at which my life seemed to be flowing in a positive direction, all because of a few easy to institute concepts.

Because of the success of the first cycle, I decided to start Cycle 2, which ran from November 2007 to the end of January 2008. I am currently near the end of Cycle 3, and I would like to share all of my successes with you. But first, a discussion of Cycle 2.

On November 4, 2007, I went to a Diana Ross concert in California. She was, as expected, divine. She sang her heart out, was in great voice, and had a wonderful time on stage. The concert lasted about 90 minutes, which was just enough time for her to sing all of the major hits from her Supremes years, as well as from her now 4 decades of solo recording.

During the concert, she sang the song “My World Is Empty Without You”, and this time, because of the heightened awareness that I had grown into because of my own Cycle 1, I sensed a completely different message than just the old love song that I had come to assume about the lyrics. This time, I heard her actually “confessing” to the audience that she needed us, and her world was “empty” without us in it. This was a completely new interpretation of the lyrics of this song, and she sang it in such a way that the force of her heart and conviction of delivery made it clear to me that she was communicating directly to those of us that were open to this message. I understood that she needed us, as much as we need her. She has always said that her fans are the best, but this time, through the emotion and delivery of this song, she touched my heart in a phenomenal way.

The balance of that concert was standard Diana Ross: Theme From Mahogany, Ain’t No Mountain High Enough, ect. I left the concert with my family members knowing that once again, we had witnessed a true and living American Icon; Diana herself is conscious of her place in history, and at this point has decided to continue to educate others about their emerging humanity by doing concerts and giving lectures.

About a week after the concert, I was sitting in my living room in San Francisco (which had a view of the entire city), and I could not get “My World Is Empty Without You” out of my mind. I began to think about what this song meant to my own existence; what was I missing, and what action would I need to take in order to feel more complete. I had spent the past seven years living in San Francisco in relative seclusion, having been present to the events in New York City of the attacks on the World Trade Center on September 11, 2001. San Francisco was as far away from there as I could get without leaving the mainland, and I used the time to heal and to find a new way in the world for myself. During those 7 years, I went back to school and earned a Masters degree in Humanities and Leadership, because I knew that I would one day begin to make a difference in the world and I wanted to offer an educated experience to those that would allow me the voice to do so.

I began to think of the song, and more and more, the song began to mean for me that I was empty without being “home”, which for me, is New York City.

Because I had just stepped into Cycle 2 of “The 90 Day Challenge”; it became obvious that returning to New York City would be the goal for the period. So by mid-November, I had determined that I would return successfully to NYC in 2008, and set out on my quest to do so. I determined that I would not accept no as an answer; I researched the job and housing market; I made telephone calls, I spoke with agents, arranged plane and hotel reservations, and on December 31, 2007 (now that I think about it, how appropriate, New Years Eve), arrived back into Manhattan with a 10 day agenda: to find a lucrative position AND find a beautiful apartment to live in that was spacious, spiritual, safe and calming.

On January 10, 2008, I boarded my flight back to San Francisco, having accomplished my goal of finding fun and lucrative employment and a beautiful new home in Manhattan. Once again, the lessons I have been applying from the movie “The Secret” and James Arthur Ray’s seminar (and now new book and DVD) “Harmonic Wealth” and my on “90 Day Challenge” had worked beautifully.

The next installment will be about Cycle 3, which I am nearing the end of at the moment.

Your comments and questions are welcome, and thank you for taking the time to read about my story.

My World Is Empty Without You.

Peace, Love and Light

Kristian Alexis Perry - I AM

The 90 Day Challenge: Day 59: What If?

What if?

As I have moved through the past 59 days of this project, I am struck with the opportunity and question: What if?

What if this is my chance to really breakthrough in my life and creates the dreams I have been longing for? What if this is it for me?

I have done a huge amount of work over the years in self-help seminars, and learned a great deal about myself and people in general. Yet, all of that information really hasn't motivated me to pull my life to a higher level. What if, instead of sitting in a seminar, that the only way to really experience those valuable lessons from the past is to apply all of that knowledge in a supremely personal way; to sit with myself and my experiences and pull from the abundance of my soul what I say I want my life to be. What if the execution and application of the designed strategies in this challenge are the last, and most profound, step needed in order to experience fulfillment of all my life's yearnings and accomplishments? And if so, what exactly is at stake here?

I must admit that I have had an amazing life. It has by no means been ordinary, and I have had exciting, life enhancing experiences that I will always cherish. Yet, I have had the feeling that there could be something more, a daily experience of living so profound, so satisfying, that it calls me forth every day. That is what this is all about for me. Achieving the ability to live a life that is
deeply satisfying, a life that will enable me to share the lessons learned and happiness I have experienced with others, and to live with love, prosperity and serenity. It is clear that for me that will come in a spiritual way, and I have already delved deeply into the ocean of knowing who I am in that respect.

As I have approached and worked through the stages of this challenge, I am thankful that I have had the life experiences that have given me strength to move through this journey. That I have reached this point in my life is not a coincidence. There are no accidents. Those of you that have found your way to these pages in many ways are on a similar challenge and journey, and I salute you for you valiant efforts. Someday I hope to hear about your valuable ocean of experiences. Ashford and Simpson once sang "I need your light with mine", and in this moment, no truer words have been spoken. We sometimes forget, or neglect to remember, that we are all in this together. Life is about relationships, communication and love. Your participation here, at this moment, has been created through divine guidance and I welcome the lessons and experiences that each of you are willing to share. We each hold a very valuable key to each others success; let us share our deepest heartfelt experiences so that this truly becomes the year that we break through and manifest the magnificence that our lives are meant to be.

I have everyday been confronted with the challenge that this process has presented - to be conscientious at each step of the program. Each direction along this journey creates a foundation for the next idea, and a pyramid of knowledge and understanding is built as I move towards my goals. My request of myself has been to stay on course, even in the worst moments, as the goal, the “prize” is always in my sights.

This challenge, for me, has been about designing the abilities to live my life as it was intended to be – brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous!

I Am.

Kristian

Still On Course

90 days. Not a very long time. Just enough time to completely redesign your life.

Over the last 42 days, I have been through a great deal. A stalker. A seriously mental one. I took action and obtained a temporary restraining order. Went to Superior Court with an attorney vs. the stalker. Obtained a restraining order that protects me for the next 3 years. Long enough to have the stalker fade out of my life forever.

I have also gained the ability to make friends again. People that make me laugh, and people that make me think. And, I’m getting myself into awesome physical shape. And my six pack in not far from being reality again. I’ll be ready for the camera again in another month and a half.

I’m gaining personal confidence and am ready for beautiful music making and an audience by February. No joke. This time it’s really serious.

I have successfully negotiated the minefield that is my financial picture, and can clearly see the light at the end of the tunnel. And am designing a program of wealth that should carry me through for the rest of my life. I've discovered that wealth is not about money, but about happiness.

Ninety days is not a lifetime, but it can sure be the start of a great second wind. I’m regaining harmony in all aspects of my life….right on target.

Now, what’s next?

The 90 Day Challenge - Days 6, 7, 8

Everyone,

The past few days have been about follow through and gaining momentum on the projects that I currently have in hand. Having completed my financial chart, I’m in the process of composing and mailing letters to relevant parties, creating a budget that will work, setting up automatic payments from my bank (which will enable me to place my attention on other matters and know that everything is being taken care of), and taking stock of changes in my behavior so that I may cement all the new activities seamlessly into my schedule.

I’ve been faithful to working out at home on my personal equipment, and it gets easier each time. I’ve found that if I make it my first activity in the morning, it feels almost effortless, and is not on my mind all day as something that I need to schedule into my day.

These few days have also been about the process of examining myself from an intellectual standpoint. I was having a conversation with a friend and during the conversation I made a statement that surprised me as being true, but I hadn’t given it any thought previously. I stated that the past 7 years have been about my grieving process surrounding the events of September 11, 2001, and that I feel that I’ve finally come out of some sort of shell. I hadn’t realized that I’d put my life on hold, but after looking over my activities for the past 7 years, that’s exactly what I’ve done. This process has allowed me to reawaken myself and to live consciously again. The amazing thing is other people that I’m associated with have also noticed the change and are making positive comments.

That I earned a Masters degree in this period totally astounds me. In the middle of all of the internal struggle that I’ve had about the 9/11 event, I found strength to go back to school and accomplish that major task. The realization that I could accomplish the requirements of a degree during this past period is a testament to the powerful humanity and intent within me, and it feels wonderful to know that about myself.

Additionally this time has also been about acknowledging that I needed to slow down a moment to take stock of the first days of this venture, and to refocus and move more aggressively to my end goal. I am very proud to say that this process is awakening many aspects of living for me, and I am seeing positive results already. Today I will continue working on the projects that I already have in hand, and ensure that my intention remains steadfast.

The 90 Day Challenge - Day 5 - Gratitude

Today I woke up with Gratitude on my mind. I've always known that I have a beautiful life, and each morning I take time to acknowledge that fact, and to express gratitude for the person that I am and the life that I have created.

Each morning when I wake up, I said “Thank You” to God for giving me the gift of another day. Then I go about looking around my home, being grateful for the things that fill my environment. I can truly say that everything in my home has been hand-picked by me, and I love and cherish each and every item, with each holding a deeper meaning of a particular time and place or activity that reminds me of having lived a full life.

My personality is apparent in each and every object. I’ve decorated my home in a style that speaks clearly to my own sensibilities, and am nurtured by the quality and meaning of each composition.

I’ve learned that a home is a place that should nurture you, give you comfort, and express to the world what your heart is about.

I’m grateful for the totality of the environment that I live in, which includes:
• The building
• The furnishings
• The color on the walls of my dwelling
• The peacefulness and energy of the space
• The elegance and vibrancy of my choices
• The weather that surrounds my existence
• The view from the windows of my home and soul
• The friends and acquaintances in my life
• The city that I currently call home
• This country
• Being a citizen of the world

Being in gratitude encompasses so much more that one might think initially. It is about ALL of the components of one’s life, loves and passions. And, it is about being grateful for, and acknowledging the greatness of, YOURSELF.

Most of all, I am grateful for this moment, realizing that there is no greater gift than being right here, right now, acknowledging and experiencing the blessing that I have been given in this moment. I AM.

The 90 Day Challenge - Day 4

Everyone,

Today’s experience has guided me to a moment of acknowledgement for the clarity gained thus far in this process.

I gathered up all of the outstanding bills and letters on my desk, and when done, realized that I had a stack about 3 inches thick. I thought, wow, how can I find the strength to confront all of this?

As I began sorting through, I realized that a large portion of the stack was duplicate material that had been forwarded to me. When I finally sorted the material by creditor and date, it became apparent that only about ½ inch of paper was currently relevant. All of the older duplications were then tossed.

As I called each creditor, it became more and more apparent that they were happy to accommodate my inquiries, and look forward to assisting me in resolving each item. As the day progressed, I sat down and created a spreadsheet of open accounts and amounts due, and found that I have a much brighter financial picture than I have given myself credit for. All in all, the total amount of debt is so much less that I had made up in my mind looking at the 3 inches of paperwork prior to starting the process.

Having made that realization, I began to think about all of the situations in my life that I conjure up thoughts about, and make more serious than they actually are, because of an inability to confront a situation and take a clear look the bottom line basics. I learned a valuable lesson yesterday – that all of the speculation and fears in my mind are just a way of keeping me from the actual acknowledgement of truth lying beneath, which is never as dire as I think. [Funny how I never really though of myself as a drama queen, but there it is, LOL!]. Once a situation is confronted and light is shed on the subject, it becomes so much smaller (literally) and falls into the realm of being possible to resolve.

There are countless situations in our lives in which we can apply this realization. Let’s take relationship as an example. How many times have we wanted to get to know someone, only to let our minds stop us from moving forward because of our own insecurities? The fact that we are willing to reach out to get to know others can be a wonderful appreciation of our humanity, yet we kill off the impulse to smile or say hello simply because we do not think we are worthy in the moment of being liked. In my own recent experience, I resisted my own “self-talk” and initiated a conversation with a couple of people that I’ve been wanting to get to know, and low and behold, they were as sweet and genuine as they could be and welcomed the opportunity of us getting to know each other better.

Now, under normal circumstances, I might look at this a just coincidence. Yet, at this stage in my life, I am certain that there are no accidents. That situation came into my life as a tool for me to learn that I should not let my personal fears stand in the way of the things that I desire in life. All I need to do is acknowledge my fear, and move forward with my intention without hesitation. The value of being courageous is more valuable than the fear of maintaining the status quo. Yes, a very, very valuable lesson learned.

This leads me to a deeper understanding of the concept of James Arthur Ray’s Harmonic Wealth philosophy. It is becoming increasingly apparent to me that all areas of one’s life work in concert in order to create the symphony of living we all refer to as “being happy”. Let the orchestra play.

The 90 Day Challenge - Day 3 - A Deeper Understanding of The Process

Everyone,

Today has been all about understanding the process. As I was going through materials, I came across a large amount of papers that I’d written in college, and decided that they should be archived. I also sorted through unanswered correspondence and am working on a plan to reach everyone by either phone or mail.

I realized that I have YEARS of old paperwork and materials packed away in boxes, along with long forgotten articles and memorabilia, so I’ve decided to embrace another project of sorting through all stored boxes, clear out all unwanted articles, file papers appropriately and dispose of everything that no longer has relevance to my life.

It’s interesting that at 3 days into this project, I am beginning to recognize the power within this process; declaring an intention, then taking action, has shed light on areas of my life that have been hidden and/or ignored for years. Almost without effort, I’m confronting the issues of personal finance, archiving personal history, cleaning out closets and staying true to my word ( “I saw what I mean, and I mean what I say”), all on the strength of having made a commitment to achieving extraordinary results. Now, tell me who I am!

I also today began work on another pillar in this process, Relationship. I initiated new friendships, spoke honestly to those around me, and was true to my heart all day. It feels magnificent standing out on a limb, experiencing the creative process at work in my life.

I am grateful for the opportunity to share this process with you. I’m also grateful for the grace that has surrounded me all of my life, and the light that shines from within.

I anticipate that my finances project should take approximately 2 weeks to complete. In that time, I will have corresponded with and set a plan of completion with every outstanding issue. At the same time, I will begin to confront and sort through the remaining four pillars of “Harmonic Wealth” that will lead me towards an extraordinary experience of living by the end of this project.

The 90 Day Challenge - Day 2

Everyone,

I am happy to report that things are still on course and moving along very well. I have also realized that its time for rubber to hit the road. As promised in my initial email and yesterday’s installment, this process promises to be a very revealing look at my life, so that others may easily resonate with the issues and concepts that will inevitably arise.

This has been a day of discovery, with financial freedom emerging as the first item requiring attention, so I have initiated work in that direction. Researching items, initiating correspondence and confronting a [very large] pile of paper on my desk at home has been the order of the evening. Additionally, contacting creditors, looking at my personal budget and taking stock of surrounding issues has been the focus.

Finance is one of the five pillars in James Arthur Ray’s “Harmonic Wealth” philosophy that I wrote about yesterday, and my senses tell me that I will gravitate to one or the other over the days and weeks to come as different issues arise. The fact of the matter is that there will/can never be complete harmony in all areas - we sometimes call that “balance”, however, life is designed to be random and will therefore generate imbalance at every turn. This is definitely a good thing. Just think about it. If everything was truly balanced, there would be nothing new to discover. What a boring existence that would be.

I’m beginning to understand the depth of the intention process that I spoke about yesterday. In my discussions and communications today, I’ve gained clarity about the necessity of placing focus on my financial well being, and am sharing that fact with you so that I may be held accountable for taking right action. I hope that you can feel my commitment and heart here. I acknowledge that I accomplished all that I could today in this direction, and much more attention is forthcoming over the course of the next 89 days and beyond.

I’ve decided to create a spreadsheet showing a workable budget comprised of obligations, amounts due, payment schedules, and workable time periods to optimize my process. This portion of the project will definitely move beyond the 90 day challenge, as should be expected; what is important here is that I am creating a new habit that will allow for final resolution on open issues over the next few years. Starting - and continuing - a process like this has been difficult for me over the years, and now I realize that in order to truly be “wealthy”, I need to pay close attention to all aspects of my life.

Again, thank you for checking in with me, and please, do let me know what you think. I invite you to engage me in this conversation. If you think that I'm not being authentic in my conversations and actions, please tell me! My intent is to create real value here.

All the best on this day number 2,

Kristian

The 90 Day Challenge - Day 1

Day 1: July 31, 2007

First, I would like to thank all of you who have taken the time to visit my blog. I do absolutely appreciate your support. I know you have busy lives and realize that your time is valuable.

My intention here is to include you in my process of discovery, and to involve you in a way that inspires you to move to make positive changes in your own lives. I am grateful that you have expressed interest in this new project that I am creating.
Because this is the first day of my 90 day project, I want you to know that I have decided to place focus on areas of my life that will enable me to experience life more fully, or as James Arthur Ray has stated, to obtain “Harmonic Wealth”. This means, essentially, that I begin to create movement in 5 key areas: 1) financial, 2) relational, 3) mental, 4) physical and 5) spiritual. Over the years, I have accomplished modest success in each area, only to experience each change to a state of inactivity over time. My plan is to deliver intense focus and intention to effect permanent positive change in each area.

The power of intention - that is - the ability to focus with sincere intent in accomplishing my stated goals, is very real for me at this moment in my life. I will be confronting every aspect of my life here, and you are invited to watch me work through issues and hurdles that have kept me from realizing my full potential.
As this statement of intention is the first step in this process, I thought it might be appropriate to post the following article on the significance of intention, written by Marcia Wieder, a life coach:

Four Steps For Setting An Intention

It’s time to change the way we think and speak about our dreams. Transforming a conversation, just like manifesting a dream, begins by setting an intention. Your intentions will assist you in taking greater control of your life.

A working definition for intention is: “to have in mind a purpose or plan, to direct the mind, to aim.” Lacking intention, we sometimes stray without meaning or direction. But with it, all the forces of the universe can align to make even the most impossible, possible. My intention is to transform the conversation around dreams from fear and doubt, to hope and possibility, followed by action and results.

The media and masses say, “It’s time to be realistic.” Consider this. Without our dreams all we have is our present reality. Reality is not a bad thing. We have to know where we are so we can design the appropriate strategy for getting to where we want to be. The challenge is our attitude around “reality” and being “realistic” and what being realistic has cost us. Often that’s our passion and joy, our hopes and dreams.

Given the unknowns and sometimes craziness of life, there’s never been a more important time to dream and setting your intention is the first step. When should you set an intention? You could set an intention every day. It can be specific and about something in particular or more like a quality, such as to be more relaxed or involved with life.

First Steps:

1. Get clear about something you want and write it down.

2. Share your intention with someone in a way that will supportively hold you accountable to taking action.

3. Do something today to demonstrate your commitment to your intention.

4. Acknowledge that you did what you said you would and then, take the next step.

As written in the steps above, I’ll list today’s list of intentions. As I’ve stated in my original email, I will not divulge my final goals in order to allow you to experience this process from a fresh perspective.

1. Get clear about something you want and write it down

What I want is the ability to set positive intentions for myself and to follow through and do them no matter what. Today, the list is comprised of exercising, writing, reading, thinking and creating a plan of action that is challenging and life-affirming that will lead me to attainment of several undisclosed goals. Additionally, to take every situation that comes to me and utilize it to affirm my talents and abilities.

2. Share your intention with someone in a way that will supportively hold you accountable to taking action.

Share with someone…that would be you! I’m on the hook and at stake beginning NOW.

3. Do something today to demonstrate your commitment to your intention.

I have read articles pertaining to the power of setting intentions, done physical exercise, written in this blog and communicated with you about my intentions. Now that I have put my self at stake with you, I have a reason to produce the things I say. Accountability is everything!

4. Acknowledge that you did what you said you would and then, take the next step.

O.K. I promised that I would start my project’s process today and communicate with you through my blog, and I have done so. Now, on to building and designing a program for myself that works!

Ms. Weider’s philosophy on this subject radiates with clarity. It’s time for me to take action, and I will report tomorrow on the outcome of today’s intentions. Please stay tuned….

RAIN

RAIN.

Warm drops of water falling from a heavenly place upon my face to give me God kissed tears of wonder.

RAIN.

Like moments of epiphany, each one special, each one unique, each one loving.

RAIN.

Recently having moved to a higher ground, I find myself in awe of the wonders that are being revealed to me just by observing the world around me. Recently, I was introduced to “The Secret”, and began to understand and uncover the hidden magic that life can be. The information that I’ve come to respect is so simple that it stuns my senses, and I want to share it with you.

The Secret, in truth, is the starting point for understanding The Universal Laws. These laws, which govern everything around us, are at once spiritual and metaphysical, and I invite you to journey with me to gain a deeper understanding of what they are and how to utilize them in order to live the life of our dreams.

The Universal Laws have been with us forever, yet their power and majesty have been veiled by powerful individuals and organizations for centuries. It is my desire to expose you to these great truths, and to create an experience that you can participate in that will enable you to utilize the full power of these principles, facilitating an abundant and meaningful life.

I have been working on a project that I have entitled “The Secret Key”, which is about allowing the principles of the Universal Laws to reveal themselves to you, and creating circumstances in which you have an experience of each during a single weekend. The project is designed for both the discovery and application of each of the 12 Laws. I believe that once you are clear, through experience, of each principle, you can then take the information learned and apply it to your daily life and create magic. As an experiential training, the format is set to encompass 3 days - Friday evening (7 pm to 11 pm), all day Saturday (10 am to 10 pm) and Sunday (10 am to 8 pm). I am currently researching an appropriate setting for the experience, which will begin in November 2006.

The inspiration for the creation of this experience has been brewing within me for the past 25 years. I’ve wanted to create a unique experience that would allow for creation of a possibility that would affect one’s life for the better. I have, over the years, participated in many different types of experiences, including performing my own cabaret show in New York City for 10 years; found a sense of magic in the metaphysical training “Joy’s Way”; gained insight through "new thought" trainings such as “est”, “The Experience”, “Insight”, and the “Psychic Development Project”; studied the philosophies of Landmark Education and Scientology; applied the teachings of Ralph Waldo Emerson; did “The FireWalk Experience” with Anthony Robbins; trained at The Actors Institute in New York City, visited Sky High Ranch (an ashram associated with "Joy's Way")in Southern California, traveled to Sedona, Arizona, and read extensively the works of Neale Donald Walsch, Werner Erhard, John Hanley, Sr. and many other masterful thinkers and philosophers. I hold both Bachelor of Arts and Master of Arts degrees in Humanity and Leadership, and am truly an accomplished teacher and conduit for change. I invite you to join me on this exciting journey of discovery.

For more information and to be placed in cue for the beginning experience, please contact me using the link below.

Email: universal.laws@gmail.com


Peace, Love and Light,


Kristian Alexis Perry

The Secret

Hello everyone.

Recently, I've been exposed to some amazing information that is changing the way I look at myself and life. It has to do with the way our natural abilities are utilized, and I am currently in the middle of study of the Universal Laws, a course for understanding the application and facilitation of an intricate and sensitive way of being that opens up all kinds of possibilities for creating the life of my dreams. Subsequently, I plan to utilize this information in several ventures currently under development that will facilitate the fun, creativity and abundance of LIFE to shine.

As stated before, I have a commitment to create a personal legacy that encompases making effective changes in the world around me. By this declaration I intend to make this information available to others, allowing them to experience the joy and satisfaction of a life well lived. The development of this process is leading me down some very interesting roads, so....stay tuned....

(if you're feeling adventurous, click the secret link above....)

Kristian

You Know Who I Am.......

Inspired by the “Essence 25” speech delivered by Oprah Winfrey, written
by Khephra Burns


Man, look at me! Not even one month old
and calling for a revolution. Truth be told,
I was a revolution.

I'm 53 now. A man of my time. A product of
my own generation. I know who I am.

I was conceived in the struggle, when Black
Power and the Freedom Movement
mated in a hotbed of social unrest.

When I was born in the dawn of the new
decade I cried,''Black is beautiful!
Brotherhood is powerful!'' I had emerged full-grown,
the real Adonis. And had a nine-inch
Afro to prove it.

Fact is, I was fine, and for the first time,
I knew it. Knew that I was stunning in all my
licorice-black, cocoa-brown, caramel and
cafe'-au-lait skin tones.

I turned 400 years of pain into pride as for
the first time I was loving the soft contours
of my African nose, my full, luscious lips
and the ample, round behind that Black women
call my onion `cause it brings tears to their
eyes. Said I had more English in the small of
my back than Webster had in the dictionary.

But never mind English. Habari Gani, sister.
Habari Gani, brother. In the `70's we had
decided to speak Swahili. . .and you were going
to liberate some of this good lovin' in the
name of the revolution. But then, when I
turned to wage the struggle on the gender
front, the revolutionary fire and rhetoric
just went right out of you. Mmm hmm. It's all
right here in the book. My diary for the last 53 years.

Oh, I know you loved me. How could you help
yourself, when I was too beautiful to be
ignored, too determined to be denied, much
too outspoken to be seen and not heard, and
otherwise just too marvelous for words?

Back then they called me Martin Luther King,
Malcolm X and Cassius Clay. That was
me who marched into Atlantic City and told
the Democratic Convention I was sick and
tired of being sick and tired. I had a
history of tired in my bones. Not the kind of
tired that makes you want to sit down, but
makes you want to get up.

I was the voice of the Black revolution. I
was a Black candidate for president
too. They called me a nervy so-and-so, a
troublemaker, a subversive. Reverend Jesse Jackson.

I've been called a lot of things lately --
congressman, surgeon general,
secretary of energy, mayor and more.
At 53 I'm a Renaissance man, already a
legend in my prime.

Forgive me if I boast a bit, but I am an
Emmy-winning, Oscar-copping, Grammy-grabbing,
Pulitzer Prize poet and Nobel Laureate,
beloved. My word, yes, I'm bookish. On
everybody's bestseller list. Seems like all
my best conjure comes out in words. Words
that cast spells like the songs of Solomon,
like jazz. Words that possess the secret of joy.

I know you know me. I was that sass-mouthed
colored boy on Broadway who couldn't just
sing a nice somewhere-over-the-rainbow song.

I spoke for the tree and the rock and the
river when morning dawned and a rallying
pulse kept hope alive in America.

My byline alone would fill a volume or two.
I'm Langston Hughes and Gregory Hines. I’m Harry Belefonte and
Bill Cosby. Look me up sometime, I'm in the book.

I've gone from Motown to Tinseltown, but I've
never forgotten where I came from. I went
from lead singer supreme to Hollywood's first
leading man in a big-screen Black love story. I’m Billy Dee.
But I haven't forgotten that
back before my time Bill Robinson could only dance in the movies.

I've given my own talent a two-thumbs-up,
`cause 53 years of raves right here say
brother acts, in Raisin in the Sun and Sounder, Malcolm X
and The Color Purple. You saw my name when
the credits rolled. I'm Sidney Poitier, Brock Peters, and
Wesley Snipes and Denzel Washington and Danny Glover.
I’m Blair Underwood and Robert Townsend. I'm Spike Lee.

I'm a Hollywood mogul and an entertainment empire.
I'm Puff Daddy. I’m Kanye West.

I've had to orchestrate my own fanfare for 53
years, so forgive me if I toot my horn for
another chorus or two. But from R&B to pop,
from rap to rock, everything I touch turns to
gold. I've battled my way into the opera
houses. I sing jazz. I am jazz. And my song
is simply unforgettable.

You know me. But just for the record, I'm
Nat King Cole and Ray Charles, Jackie Wilson and Eddie Kendricks, Prince and Michael Jackson. I'm Bobby Short, Marvin Gaye
and Donny Hathaway. And oh, by the way,
I run the company now, too. Say you didn't
catch my name? I'm Berry Gordy, Jr.

Olympic in stride and epic in my progress, I
have triumphed in every field of endeavor.
I'm the fastest man in the world, the
president of a Fortune 500 company and a
space-shuttle astronaut. I'm Michael Jordan, Mr. Johnson, thank you, and your friendly Superman.

Like an Afro-American Express card,
I'm everywhere you want to be.

I stole the runways of Paris and redefined
fine as a tall, breathtaking, dark-skinned silouette.
I am a fashion statement. Here's my book. I'm Kristian Alexis Perry.

And my look? 53 years ago, my `do was all
picks and `fros and Afro-puffs. But today you
might see me straightened, braided, bald,
twisted, dyed or locked in a
dreadful headful, all woolly woven down
around my strong brown shoulders. Yeah Baby.

Just so there's no mistaking my identity,
I am free, Black and 53, independent of mind
and centered in the spirit. I know who I am.
I'm only telling you `cause I think you
should know who you're dealing with.

But mine is an open book, a public diary.
I didn't write it to read you. I love you.
Say, brother and sister, look here, you've even got your own
page, to tell me what's in your heart.
I tell you what's in mine.

Over the last 53 years I have soared and
stumbled, but always forward. I'm only 53,
but I've been around, and I've been
there. . . for you, my sister, and for you,
my brother, all along. You know me, I'M BLACK, AND I'M BEAUTIFUL.

bonjour.....

The Elegant Truth

“Momma, who am I?”

“You are my beautiful baby and I love you.”

“...Why?”


I. North Carolina: A Star in Winter

I was born on a cold, snowy winter’s night in February, 1953. It was an unusual night I am told, because there was thunder and lightning associated with the snowstorm that was occurring. My mom was very afraid of thunder and lightning, so having to experience the birth of her first child must have added an extra dimension of anxiety and excitement.

I appeared at 3:12 am on the 7th day. I have had an extraordinary life.

I grew up in Greensboro, North Carolina, with three younger brothers, and one sister. Our family did not have large sums of money, but our life was good. We lived in a wood frame house on an acre of land, a block away from St. Stephens, a large Presbyterian Church, and two blocks away from the Washington Street Elementary School, where I would learn to read and write and begin to develop the social skills that serve me to this day. As a young black boy, I received all the support and nurturing that I needed from my mom and various teachers. My dad was distant, never really supportive, but I know that he loved me. He was just caught up in attempting to support 5 kids and a wife, in the late 50’s and 60’s. He was a strong and simple man, very logical, but not very expressive with his love for us. It wasn’t considered masculine then to hug or cry or even say, “I love you”, and I cannot honestly remember once hearing him say he was proud of me for my accomplishments when I was a child. He had a very rough childhood as his father died when he was ten, so he had to learn to support himself emotionally and physically as best he could. But I know that he loved us because he provided for the family as best that he knew how. I missed his personal support, but I was a “star” child - by that I mean that I did well in school, I was cute and all the teachers liked me - so the lack of his support wasn’t devastating to me. My mother was the strong opinionated type. You always knew where she stood on any issue. If she was unhappy about something, we all were aware of it. But she loved us fiercely, and protected us through every storm. My Mom and Dad had their own personal difficulties with each other, yet somehow they stayed together to protect us from the outside world. We lived in a city where major Civil Rights activity took place. My Mom knew one of the students who staged the famous Woolworth sit-in protest in Greensboro. But as children, we experienced very little if any of the turmoil going on around us.

Except...

I remember having to go up the back stairs of the movie theater to sit in the balcony when other kids went through the front door; having to ride in the back of the bus “Because”; hearing people laugh and point at me because of my skin color; and being referred to as “nigger” by a five year old boy [I was seven]. I had never heard that word before, but because of his angry delivery, it cut to the center of my heart, and I will never forget it. Although we were incredibly sheltered, these incidents are a part of my soul and I long ago decided to use my life to end such bigotry and hate.

My mother and father were incredibly beautiful individuals, and as their first born, they loved to have me photographed. I was a beautiful child, and every chance I got, I was in front of a camera. It didn’t matter who it belonged to. I just had to have my picture taken. As I view the photographs of myself from this period of my life, the one thing that astounds me the most is the profound joy that is apparent in my eyes and smile. I was a happy child, precocious and intelligent.

II. Teen Age: Tuning The Instrument
As I grew, it was very apparent that I was somehow different from my brothers and sister, and other kids in my schools and neighborhood. I was the one with the vast, imaginative dreams and a plan to somehow, someday run away to accomplish them. I learned that the library was my friend and I would travel to one located near my home on the campus of Bennett College in Greensboro, [a school for Black women - extremely prestigious and expensive]. It was rare to see such a young boy running around the campus and the young women there liked me. I befriended several librarians and they would help me discover the most wonderful books. I learned to educate myself beyond the boundaries of elementary and junior high school. I had found a fortress that would give me the answers to all of my questions “why”. That library helped me answer everything. And it also allowed me to feed my mind with the discoveries and opinions of people of other countries and ages.

As I think back, being in that atmosphere was incredibly nurturing. The women there were very kind to me, even though boys were not really allowed on campus - even young ones like me. Parents would send their daughters there to gain refined social graces and become beautiful and educated young women. Boys were the enemy as far as the faculty of the school was concerned. But I melted their hearts. I was in my very early teens and I possessed a heart of gold. I was an exception, and was allowed to walk through the campus to the library freely without monitor.

It was on those grounds that I first experienced someone playing classical music on a grand piano for the first time. I was casually walking through the Magnolia trees that heavily covered the grounds, on a stroll to the library. As I passed the building, I paused, listening intently; although I had never heard it before, the composition being played sounded incredibly familiar. The sound of that piano on that southern fall afternoon will forever remain a part of my permanent memory. I can still hear the sound and smell the magnolias as if I was standing there this very moment. Hearing that piano unlocked a door that would someday allow one of my major dreams to come true.

As I began to grow up, I noticed that in my dreams I could hear incredible music - the most beautiful symphonies playing in my head as a soundtrack to my dreams. I would often envision myself flying in my dreams, soaring to the music. I developed a passion for listening to classical music, as it was an earthly replica of what my dreams were creating for me each night.
I have learned, and it is my belief that there is another dimension that I have been blessed to experience, and it is comprised of the most beautiful music in the universe. My dreams were also vibrant with exquisite color that was alive, throbbing to each measure of the music. As I grew older, I could hear the music during my waking hours as well. I hear it in every composition and song, I can see it in every beautiful painting, and it flows through me with every beat of my heart. No matter what I do, I am also experiencing the music within. A secret, glorious, golden mystery has been revealed for me to see and experience and share.

In my teen years, I began to hear a voice. A beautiful, feminine voice of love. It captivated me. Never before had I heard a human voice sound as if the hand of God had caressed it. She was making herself known to me. Her name was Diana and her voice was as vibrant and beautiful as my symphonic dreams. I knew that she had been blessed with the same energy that I could feel running through me. The more I heard her speak and sing, the stronger I became in the realization of my destiny. She was, and still is, my muse. She is with me in everything that I do and say.


III. Growing Pains: Transition
My school years went by quickly. Upon graduating high school, I decided to go to technical school, because it was inexpensive (my family couldn’t afford to send me to college, and I did not have major conversations with anyone at the time to consider alternatives) and because of my experience with the library at Bennett College, I wanted to pursue a higher education. Unfortunately, my study at the time was misdirected, and I ended up in a field of study that I really wasn’t interested in at all. While attending school, I worked at a cotton mill in Greensboro. I was offered a job in the data processing division, and since that was one of the areas that I was studying, I decided to take the job full time and so I subsequently left school.

I worked at the cotton mill for seven years, leaving in 1978 to relocate to New York City. Many of my close friends were leaving North Carolina, and I was ready to take on the world and myself.


IV. Reaching Out
I got on the airplane with $500.00 in my pocket and a promise of a place to stay for one week. I found in New York City the energy and excitement that I had always dreamed about in North Carolina, so being there was a dream come true for me. I lived in Manhattan for eighteen years.

Upon my arrival, I was hired by Metromedia Television to operate their small commercial programming computer system. The station was an exciting place. I met some of the most fascinating people - Marian Etoile-Watson, Butterfly McQueen, Wilma Rudolph, Melba Moore, Broadway people, dancers, singers - it was incredibly exciting. Bill Boggs taped a 2-hour show there every afternoon in Studio A, and his guests would arrive early for makeup and I would sometimes get to meet them. Watching these personalities up close gave me a real sense of what it is to truly love yourself and give of your talents freely. I learned much from interacting with people at the Studio. They could be tough as nails, but there was always a beautiful heart that would jump out eventually. They taught me that there is no one more special than myself. No one could ever do anything the way that I could. I learned to trust myself, even when I am surrounded by disagreement.

There was a beautiful piano in the studio, and I was given permission by one of the executives to enter the studio and play it on Saturdays. I wanted to teach myself to play the instrument. After several weeks of just making non-lyrical musical noise, I decided that I would search out a teacher. Teaching myself would not be an option. I needed help. Then I got sidetracked.

At the studio while walking down the hallway one day, I happened to be singing, and one of the executives heard me and told me that I should do it for a living. [God and my muse were guiding me to fulfill my destiny]. I had been singing in my small apartment constantly to disco music with divas the likes of Diana Ross, Donna Summer and Barbra Streisand, and I developed quite a beautiful voice of my own. As a child, I had always spoken beautifully, and as a young man, the timbre of my voice was golden and mellifluous. I auditioned at a major Cabaret club (Freddy’s) and they booked me on the spot! I immediately changed my name: from Lamont Bruce Groves to Kristopher Lamont Perry. I needed a name that was more memorable, and one that would represent the future that I seemed to be heading towards so swiftly. Having never given a serious thought to putting a concert together of my own, I formed a trio - two backup singers, and myself: Diane Span and Chandra Armstead - and we completed the engagement successfully. From there I went on to perform solo in virtually every major Cabaret venue in the city. I have sung duets with some of the most beautiful and talented women in the world - Jane Olivor, Chante Moore, Natalie Douglas just to name a few. And I also have worked with some of the most brilliant pianists in the world: Peter Wright, John Jacobson, Kenneth Mallor, Westley Naylor; on and on I could go. I became a local celebrity. People would walk up to me that had attended my concerts expressing the joy they had experienced from my singing. Life was good. The symphonies played feverishly in my heart, and the love flowed effortlessly from my voice into the hearts of those around me.

Being on stage was very challenging, so I decided to take a closer look at my life and develop the abilities that I felt I would need to truly be successful. I went to the Actors Studio and took seminars and volunteered to be around other artists. I sang and danced until I would fall asleep from exhaustion. I was determined to be the best.

I had at the time a friend in New York who was a follower of Gurumayi, also known as Swami Chivalasananda. She is a recipient of all of the divine energy of Buddha and quite a beautiful, peaceful being. I was given the opportunity to approach her, and all I could say was “Thank You”. At that moment, she raised her peacock feathers and blessed me with them. From that meeting, I went on to study the yogas; I read the most incredible spiritual writings and was introduced to the most amazing people. I read a lot of Shirley Maclaine’s books; “discovered” crystals; and took seminars from people known to be popular in the New Age movement. I worked with Anthony Robbins and did the Fire Walk Experience. As Diana had done before me, I did the Erhard Seminar Training (EST), in search of the true meaning of my life. I found it. [This Is It]. I meditated at a California ashram located at Sky High Ranch in the San Bernardino Mountains and discovered that I am larger than the limitations of my body. I studied different disciplines (Scientology, Buddhism, Zen, etc.) and learned that they all have the same basic truths at the heart of their teaching; I did everything Lifespring had to offer and learned that tears and love are closely related when you begin to experience life through your heart with authenticity and passion. While involved there, I was often a volunteer, and worked closely with the trainers. The coaching that I received there has endured and remains some of the most valuable of my lifetime. I became an accomplished coach and lead a group of people successfully through a leadership course as a test of my personal growth. I was contributing to the world around me in ways I had never dreamed possible just by saying yes to projects. My life had become full and interesting.

Although I was succeeding as a vocal artist and expanding as a person, I needed a stable income, so I continued to work in the data processing field. I had managed to have two careers at once. They were both working successfully through 1990.


V. The Spiritual Encounter

One night while walking around Gramercy Park alone after a concert, I came upon a tall stranger who gave his name as J.C. He seemed to have appeared out of nowhere, and I was startled by his presence. I would often take a walk around the small and beautiful park at night - it was in a safe neighborhood, well lit, and was incredibly peaceful. I was feeling a little lonely that night, as I had enjoyed myself tremendously on stage, and as has nearly always been the case, I had no one to share it with. I understand what so many successful artists of our time have gone through. To feel the adoration and love from the stage is a heady drug. When I was separated from it, I wanted to be held and loved; there was never anyone there for me after the fact and I was living a very exciting, lonely life. I was becoming isolated within my golden walls. Adored for the gifts that I brought to the stage, the emotions that I revealed, the love that was present in the room, I could not, however, find someone to love me for myself. This man, J.C., looked at me with the most beautiful, loving and trusting eyes. I felt acknowledged. He asked my name and of what I did in life. I explained to him that I was a singer, and that it was my intention to be a major star someday. He looked at me with the most incredible otherworldly glow in his face and said: “Yes, I am sure you will.” Then he walked past me, I took three steps, turned to watch him walk away, but to my surprise, he was nowhere to been seen! He had vanished into thin air as quickly as he had appeared. It was at that moment that I realized that I had just had a conversation with the real J.C., and yes, I would, someday, become a star.


VI. The Music Stops
In 1991 a friend confided in me that he had AIDS, and since he was estranged from his family, asked me if I would be willing to take care of him through his illness. How could I say no? I stopped singing to devote more time to him, and in the process worked through the next 2 years with him until his death. This had a profound effect on me. It saddened me, I was not singing, and life in New York City in general was getting tougher than ever. I had a nice life, but I had hit a dead end. What should I do?

I was on my way to the World Trade Center to do banking on the day that it was bombed in February 1993. That explosion was a precursor as to what would happen in my own life. The job market was getting tighter, and in March of that year, I lost my job of seven years due to “downsizing”. I also turned 40 that year, and like many people, I had a major mid-life crisis. I took a good, clear look at my life, where I had been, what I had done, where I wanted to go next, and set out plans to do so.

After almost 15 years in the computer field, I was no longer feeling satisfied with my work, so I decided to change careers, and set out to do work in administrative support. I quickly succeeded in that area and it allowed for more flexibility in locating jobs and working with a greater wealth of companies.

In 1995, after having watched Amisted Maupin’s “Tales of The City”, I decided to relocate to California. I closed up my life in New York City and moved to San Francisco. It was my intention to start over, create an even more successful life and begin to truly enjoy my daily experiences. Upon my arrival here, I found a job on the second day here with a major company, and in addition I did volunteer work at the Aids Health Project, counseling HIV negative men on how to stay healthy, and keep a positive mental attitude about what was going on around them. There were so many of us who had never had a voice in the epidemic, and I had found a place where I felt I was making a difference in the community, by counseling others on how to maintain their negative status and continue to enjoy life. Life in the city has had its magic moments, and for those I am truly grateful.

VII. Music, Light and The Voice of Love’s Return

I still hear incredible symphonies in my dreams. My current life is a happy one. In 1996, I legally changed my name for the third and final time. Having started anew, I wanted to leave the energy of New York City behind me and open myself to new possibilities. So in March of that year, I became known as Kristian Alexis Perry. The evolution is complete. From beautiful baby boy to exquisite man.

By 1997 I was living in a beautiful home, with great roommates. I had a job that I enjoyed with a major bank in San Francisco, and I was dating. It has become extremely important for me to take care of myself. I do my best to eat right, I exercise frequently, I am sang occasionally around town and to the best of my ability, I kept a positive mental outlook. My main focus now is to appreciate myself, my accomplishments, and look towards the future with an open heart and mind. At 45 years of age, I felt that my life had truly just begun. I am again on the road to self-realization. Tempered with maturity and a song in my heart, I rediscovered that this gift that I was born with was given to me to share. As I speak to you, as I glance at you, as you hear my voice or feel my heart, this light of love does surely spark the love within you. You may not be aware of it at this moment, but as surely as I am one with God and her everlasting loving genius, you will come to see that today, you have truly been loved.

Epilogue (1998)

My life has been shaped by the nature of the reality that I was born into. There have been many trials - they have made me strong. And there has always been a deep and peaceful love that has quietly guided my heart through the best and worst of times, to surrender me to who and what and where I am today. It has been the nature of my universe - an all powerful and divinely assisted imagination that has taken me to wondrous places simply because I always knew that I could go and do anything that I wanted. Life shares its secrets when you surrender to the serenity and the magic of the wonder that you are.

As a child, I was always told that I was beautiful - therefore I am; that I am worthy - therefore I have self worth. I have experienced and learned from the divine presence of God in all her glory in my life - therefore I am strong and confident of my destiny. I have been blessed and am truly grateful for the gifts that I have received in my life - they have truly been incredible - and I freely give them all to you. Think of me what you may. Consider my heart in the matter. And I receive from you with open arms all that you are as you and I are one in the same. One in the same - everything, every thing.


How did I get to be the person I am today?
“Simply through the nature of love.”

Its Best To Start At The Beginning

My name is Kristian Alexis Perry. The meaning of my name, translated literally, is Annointed Protector of Mankind. Based on my life results, I consider myself a leader in the community of humanity; my name generates a deliberate positive sound and energy of spiritual eloquence that nurtures the spirit of those who speak it.

My ancestors are comprised of races from Africa, England and Scotland. I am a descendant of the regal Benin/Togo people in Africa, and Caucasians from The British Isles, woven deeply into the fabric of North American culture. The depth of my heritage is spiritually profound, bringing together aspects of culture unique to only myself. I have come to the realization that I and God are one in the same, enabling me to trust in the musings of my heart with a profound elegance that captures the positive spirit within and radiates outward into the world.

Brilliant, Gorgeous, Talented and Fabulous

My deepest fear is not that I am inadequate. My deepest fear is that I am powerful beyond measure. It is my light, not my darkness that frightens me. I ask myself, “Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?”

Actually, who am I not to be. I am a child of God. My playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around me. I am meant to shine, as children do. I was born to manifest the glory of God that is within me. It’s not just in me, it’s in everyone. And as I let my own light shine, I unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As I am liberated from my own fear, my presence automatically liberates others.

Paraphrased from Marianne Williamson – A Return to Love